So I was blessed the world forgot to tell me that 30 is the new 20 when I was in my twenties. I was fierce, I was focused, I wanted to kick start my career as soon as I crossed 18, I wanted to get married, have children, start saving, choose a city, do all of that BEFORE I was 30.
Now that I am 30, do I have all of that? Maybe not. Do I have the learning, the route map to get there (or perhaps a better mind map for choices that differ from when I was, 18?) Hell yes.
So what Meg Jay wanted to do to the way twenty-somethings were thinking, I've already lived my decade that way. Did I have truckloads of fun through my twenties? Not really. Did I have pain, heartbreak, tough times to the extent that I would look around and see NO other twenty something friend go through ANY of it? Ahan! Yeah. I think so.
However, guess what? My twenty somethings weren't all dreary and awful. A lot of it was but not all of it and now that I am 30, I have a decade of making informed decisions (information, courtesy twenties), advancing my career that I built in the past 11 years of working (courtesy: my twenties), have fun with the money I am able to earn (courtesy career built courtesy: twenties), travel to places I researched and thought of going to (through my twenties), whether or not find a partner and get married based on my experiences (courtesy: divorces, happy turned not-working relationships through...guess what. TWENTIES), love myself, adding "Identity Capital" and be happy (self love acquired after intense learning experiences, solving my identity crises through my twenties) and the list keeps going on.
I have lifted the pressure of Things-To-Do from my Thirty-somethings by doing a big chunk of it in my twenties. Growing up I always heard comments like you're always rushing through life, you're always in a hurry, slow down, smell the roses. Well, I was investing in who I might wanna be next, maybe I was planting and rearing those roses to have a better quality crop that lasts me longer?
Watching Meg Jay talk about all of this in her video, it makes me feel I have had a successful kickstart to my life so I guess I'm geared up now :)
Thanking Jay for making me realise what a great hand I've been dealt.
Howdy,
ReplyDeleteI liked how you indulged in the past in this thread. It always takes quite a lot to look behind you and be somewhat, if not more, happy for the things you've had in life and what roles they've played in bringing you to the spot in life where you're. I have a tough time trying to make long-term plans. I look at people who have a five-year or so plan down the road, and I think there's something wrong with me, because I usually don't. And at times I take that as an inability of mine to do so. I suppose one could say I take life, for the most part, as it comes to me. Regardless, when I look back, I feel rather strongly that I've turned out and done much better. Of course, you can always look back at the experiences you've had and wished for them not to happen, and perhaps, it may have had turned out differently, but, despite how broken and twisted and tough and downright negative those experiences were, each one of them chipped and chiseled your little parts into finer shapes, perhaps to fit better.
So I am glad that you can maintain a positive outlook towards life. :)
I got late this morning because of watching One Tree Hill on TV while eating breakfast alone, but something one of the guys in there said, that I already knew of in more than one ways, resonated loudly. It was: "regrets make you grow old, and bitterness poisons the people around you."
My best wishes though.
PS. A very happy belated birthday to you!
Thanks for the kind words. Coincidentally just over this weekend a friend of mine asked "so what's your grand plan?" and for once in my life, I didn't have an answer. I used to make 5 year, 10 year and even 20 year plans up until I was perhaps 25, 26? Since then I have stopped making long term plans and I find myself a much more free, happy and positive person. Not that I was negative in making my plans when I did, though somehow they reined me in and didn't quite allow me to look on the outside and be more...ummm...experimental, so to say?
ReplyDeleteIf you mean my birthday as in rebirth, thanks a ton, I believe we should celebrate that one every day of our lives, change is the only constant.
Biological however is not up until July so thanks anyway :)
Keep reading, keep thinking, keep commenting! :)